Just say No

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, there was an evil. The forces of good tried round the clock to put this darkness away, but in it is apparent that their efforts were unsuccessful and some may argue that they pushed others to the dark side. The force is not at play here, and you dont need to be a jedi to grasp it.

What every happened to the keep kids of drugs programs, especially in school? I was a part of DARE and I turned out ok, having only a partial spoon habit (joking). It seems that the program is no more, the anti drug policy has become crossword puzzles on the back of the school lunch milk cartons, along with every other “be a better person” campaign. It seems that the schools just said “F it” and cut drug education along with everything else (excepts football of course), so now it's up to the parents to keep from taking bong hits with your children (reefer is a gateway drug).

The big oops may have been their timing; they started young and then gave up in middle and especially high school. I got my info in 5^th grade (as you know they next high is a top priority to a 5^th grader) and it was over. Even the level headed brain child that I am now, major life decisions are not meant for a 10 year old. So in middle school, when the monster started showing its ugly head, there was no “no” reinforcement techniques. The system failed and lead to the high drop out rates.

Now that I think about it, they did the same thing with sex ed and hygeine training. I learned that BO juice was a good thing in 5^th grade and thats the last I heard. In 6^th grade they would mention that showering and laundry were good, but nothing major. Once again, I got that knowledge from my chocolate milk and nothing says be a better person like non fat chocolate milk Friday!

At least they were trying in the 90's, now a days you cant even find a free poster or have campus security come talk to your class or nothing, a lot of schools dont even have a nurse any more. I guess the pro drug campaign just put up more money than the anti and had better free samples. Think about it, as a kid, pencils are ok, but then in middle school, the anti parent, pro individuality phase kicks in and the free samples of dirt grass from your high school neighbor pull more weight that a t shirt. Cool merchandise is crucial, I think one of the best things pro hygiene had going for it was the free deodorant sample, especially to the children who have no pit hair; biology is crazy (which is yet another reason why math is better).

Hate to say it, but the pro reading campaign sucks as well, post elementary. Think about it, books are sweet in the young days because of the authors who were not affected by the anti drug movement (Seuss). What kid doesnt want a mushroom trip about green eggs, in high school, they have to keep it going, but unfortunately vampires dont do LSD.

At the end of the day, the world needs better role models for high schoolers, pop stars are crappy, self absorbed people with a selfish agenda. Parents are great role models, but they dont get much respect by their kids until adulthood (which is how to judge success). We nees a Pootie Tang to mumble gibberish and make “cool” PSAs. OR, step it up celebrities, rather than sucker punch and surprise your opponent with an elbow to the face (world peace huh?) maybe show some class and sportsmanship with a high five. By all means, go to rehab, but dont relapse and flash the “great divide” to the paparazzi (those guys suck). Celebrities, you basically live life like a high school popularity contest, use your appeal for good, join the chess team or something. Give the teenagers something better to vote for via text than which bimbo to marry. Look at the old milk ads, those worked well, do that with crack, except the other way around. I'll even use my celebrity to kick it off (“Got crack” you shouldn't, only plumbers and cable guys do).

Do whatever, just do it fast, reincarnate McGruff, not McGrif (bonus if you know it). At the end of the day, no junkie in a dog suit is going to affect your life, the decision is in your hands, you have to put your education to work, so it falls on the system to instill moral and logic to help the youth.